Sunday, July 5, 2009

Kendine bak... Uwazaj na siebie

So I opened my Bible and was looking for something...
profound to say, to think, to feel, to write about

Inside it's like a raging sea. Everything's crashing against itself and I want to express it somehow but don't have words. Usually it's at night when the day's over that everything hits.

I got "excuse me"ed last night by a neighbor when I finished singing a song at 10:05pm. 5 minutes after the quiet hour does not mean it's necessary to shhhhh someone. It's not a habit of mine. I am usually quiet by 9:55pm if I'm playing my guitar at night. Geeezzzzz.... Anyways... I digress.

In Psalm 55 some descriptive words are...
restless,
oppression,
anguish,
terrors,
fear,
trembling,
overwhelms,

Then the writer says something that sounds like my life for the last few years...
"Oh that I had wings like a dove! I would fly away and be at rest; yes, I would wander far away; I would lodge in the wilderness;"

Then the writer says something that sounds like a conversation I've just started to open up...
"For it is not an enemy who taunts me--then I could bear it;"

I've started to revisit my high school years. All these songs that I used to sing week after week are coming back to my memory. Back then I couldn't remember the verses to save my life, but they're coming back from my memory with clarity that I never had before. Like volumes of lyrics that have been dormant for years are resurfacing. This morning I sang, "Lord Most High" and the "Many men will drink the rain" song.

The end... no concluding thoughts. It's time to go anyways. Could someone pray for my back. It's seriously hurting. Ugh... I need to strengthen it. Discipline thy self. holla.